Women, The Church, and Leadership

In 1990, I was shunned. I was shunned all because I was a woman. I was the youth pastor of a small church in Southern California. There were times when I wondered if I had committed the most offensive sin in the world. They male youth leaders told their students and other leaders to have nothing to do with my youth group or me. They believed scripture without looking at the context of the cultural or historical setting of which it was written.

During my sixteen years of youth ministry, I didn’t stomp around and scream for equal rights. I led the group of young people that was entrusted to me and did my best with every endeavor that I led our group to do. After sixteen years of youth ministry (in only two churches), I left youth ministry. It was not a pretty exit, but I left with as much dignity as I could and began to pursue a new career and my writing. Power came when I chose to have dignity and not tell everyone how wrong they were.

On Friday, March 8, 2019, we celebrated International Day of Women. Stories of powerful women flooded the Internet and were honored on all types of social media feeds. These powerful women never walked away when people told them to leave or told them that they could not do something. They did not stomp off and scream how horrible and wrong everyone around them were. With steadfastness, they pursued their cause, and because of these powerful women, the world has received their benefits.

Christians have debated the roles of women in the church. Many take one passage and follow it. (There are many passages that people need to take and follow, but that’s for another day.) In the passages where it states that women were to be silent and not have authority over men, they overlook the women in the Bible that had authority over men (Deborah, Esther, Tryphena, and Tryphosa, etc.). The women who were to be silent and not have authority were the ones who were mixing in their false doctrines with Christianity.

If women cannot lead and speak, then all men must work in the following areas of the church: Nursery, children’s ministry, youth ministry, kitchen (don’t want your food to be prepared by lowly women who could discuss scripture with those with whom they are cooking), music, women’s Bible studies, Bible quiz teams, secretaries, finances, cleaning, etc.

Understanding scripture in the context of which it is written is vital to the reader. It’s like reading a Mark Twain novel and not understanding the language that he uses because you do not have any knowledge of the time period. Reading comprehension is vital to Scripture, news media, history books, science books, and even novels. Once we are able to understand that what we are reading may be different from our own experiences, we can better understand the piece of literature.

To those men who shunned my youth group and me, all is forgiven, but all is not forgotten. I refuse to forget because that would mean I didn’t learn from the experience to investigate my beliefs and understanding of scripture first before condemning someone else. I also understand that some of those men have changed their theological beliefs and today they support women in leadership in the church.

As I studied Queen Esther, I recognized that she was able to rise to the occasion because she allowed the events in her life to influence each step that she took in her life and was able to save her nation because of it. She did not stomp and scream. She did not demand respect. She earned it. The best leaders in the world earn respect; they don’t demand it. The best leaders in the world know how to negotiate, listen to others, give grace and mercy, and influence others. It’s what gives them power.

Women have been leading in the church since its beginning. Women do not have to take over from men, but to work together with men in leadership in order to bring more people to Jesus. That is the ultimate goal that we must always remember in the church. Our goal is to bring people to Jesus, show them his love, and disciple them. God has used women, men, children, and even a donkey to deliver his message. God is bigger and more powerful than any human. We need to put our trust in Him and allow his work to be done. He can use anyone. He wants to use us all with our unique talents and abilities. Let’s allow people to use their gifts and talents to build the kingdom of God and see what he can do. 

“So, in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise.” Galatians 3:26-28