A Better Christian...Or Not

Lately I’ve been pondering. This could be dangerous because when I ponder, I begin to think differently than others, and some people struggle with those of us who think differently than them. I am going to step out on faith and leap and admit my thoughts. I would like to know what makes one Christian better or deeper than another Christian. Is it their knowledge? Is it the way they worship? Is it their obedience to the Ten Commandments? Is it their church attendance? Is it their acts of service? I wonder because I’ve only been told that a Christian is better or deeper than another Christian to insult one Christian or a church.

As I was editing and revising my book for those who need to overcome the hurt from the church, I realized that many people hurt others with their subtle statements that reveal arrogance and superior righteousness, which does not make anyone better, deeper, or even a mature Christian.  The life of a Christian is a journey. A journey is not a ladder that you climb and reach the top and sometimes you slip and fall all the way to the bottom, and then climb back up when you do the right things. A journey is a life that has twists, turns, straight lines, hills, and valleys. A Christian’s journey is to walk with Jesus and toward Him. In the last few years, I have realized that at any given time, someone may be at a different part on the journey. That person may appear better, but in reality, he or she is just in a place that the journey may have a way to use faith that can only be used by those who are mature in Christ, which never appears as “better” or “deeper.” It’s usually full of persecutions, failures, and heartaches.

I do believe that there is maturity in Christ. Paul says that it is time to eat meat and not just drink milk. “For my part, brothers and sisters, I was not able to speak to you as spiritual people but as people of flesh, as babies in Christ. I gave you milk to drink, not solid food, since you were not yet ready for it. In fact, you are still not ready, because you are still worldly. For since there is envy and strife among you, are you not worldly and behaving like mere humans?” 1 Corinthians 3:1-3 (NIV) Maturity is not revealed in terms of “better” or “deeper”. It’s a faith that is needed in times of trials. For people who claim to be “better” Christians, I believe that they miss a prominent portion of that verse. “Since they are still worldly,” Paul then gives the definition of being worldly, “envy and strife among Christians.” Envy and strife. Those two attributes reside in many Christians.

With envy, Christians will insult another Christian in order to keep that person from moving forward with their gifts or talents. With strife, Christians argue (Where should I begin?) with those who think or believe differently than them on political, spiritual, worshipful, artful, emotional, and intellectual issues. Actually, the list is much longer.

Strife. It’s what is breaking the church today. Are we being “better” when we tear others down who worship differently than us? Are we being “better” when we refuse to listen? Are we being “better” when we sit back and do nothing and the signs are all around us that the world needs the love of Jesus?  I believe we are doing much worse and it’s time to make a change.

I keep seeing Christians sharing memes that tear down and judge other churches or Christians. The meme starts with the idea that those who do not worship like them or preach like them or sing like them or serve like them, or whatever you want to add, are not true Christians or worshippers. It makes me wonder. Is God not powerful enough to be able to be worshipped in various means? Can God handle old hymns with pianos and organs, as well as loud music with new praise songs? I believe that God, who created the universe and knows every single person on earth by name, can do that. I know that there are some Christians who are mature in their faith, but does that make them better than those who are not there yet? Why do we compare? The answer lies within a heart problem.

Our hearts are defected. We lack loving others because we struggle with the idea that God loves us, with our flaws and sins. God doesn’t just love us without our imperfections. God loves us in spite of our imperfections. Since God loves us in spite of our imperfections, we can begin to love others in spite of their imperfections. God never stops loving us.

Although knowledge of who God is and what the Bible means can help us in our faith, it does not make us deeper or better. It can make us arrogant. I know because I’ve been arrogant with my knowledge and at those times I was not better, deeper or mature. I was just a mean person who was not behaving like Jesus. Jesus walked on earth with the most knowledge and chose disciples that couldn’t even figure out that if Jesus could feed 5,000 people with a two fish and five loaves of bread, that he could also feed 4,000 people with lack of supplies of food. In fact, the disciples had many problems with numbers and fish when Jesus was around them. Jesus did not choose them because they had more knowledge or were deeper. He chose them because they were faithful. They had faith in Jesus, even when they did not understand.

Ironically, the disciples also argued over which of them was the greatest. Jesus had to remind them that servants and children were greater than them because of their faith. I believe most of us need to remember that, especially if we are calling someone a “better” or “deeper” Christian.

Our society needs Christians to love on them with the love of Jesus. We are at a crucial time in our society. I’ve seen it before because history repeats itself when the people refuse to learn from the past. We need to show love to our fellow believers in Christ, and especially on social media. The world is watching. Are we going to be better? Deeper? Greatest? Or are we going to be faithful.

Pastors are People

In our current times, people have been in shock with the pastors who have had death by suicide. Recently, a young pastor in Southern California at a mega church died by suicide. It’s not just pastors in mega churches or medium sized churches. Pastors in small churches have also died by suicide. Yes, it’s a mental health issue. Yes, pastors get depressed and stress out about activities that are useless in the long run. Christians can be loving, kind, and some of the best humans to be with in community. Christians can also be cruel.

I know that Christians are humans and we sin, but I believe it’s time that we as human beings begin to empower other human beings and encourage them and lift them up like the Bible tells us to do. I would love for us to start with our leaders. There are ways people in the congregation can help with these situations.

1.     Realize that pastors are people and not God. Pastors are not God. They need to rest. They make mistakes and they sin. They hurt and they hurt others. Once we begin treating pastors like they are people, we realize that God is higher and stronger than any human and it is only through God that all can receive grace and redemption.

2.     Pastors need rest. When I was in ministry, being a workaholic was praised. First, even God took a day of rest from his creation. Since no one is God, all of us need a day of rest. Second, since we live in America (in other countries, take those afternoon siestas!), the working group of people get two days off. Since pastors work on Sundays, they should take two days off. They are people, not machines. Pastors need rest because working with people is strenuous on our hearts and minds. Being a workaholic makes us weak and tired.

3.     Build pastors, not break them. When I was in full-time ministry, I went to church stressed wondering who would complain to me that day. Stop. First, if you are offended by the pastor, follow Mathew 18 and go to that pastor in private, which is never, ever, on a Sunday or another time we are gathered at church.  Most people feel vindicated when they complain and insult the leaders in the church, especially pastors without any regard of how the pastor thinks or feels. The brain is a complicated organ. We don’t know what event can make a person break. We just know that we can break people. Jesus never told us to break people, and for goodness sake, stop threatening to fire the pastor, or one day, you’ll get someone like me who will say, “So what? As a volunteer, I’ll tick you off more.” If you must speak to a pastor because you are offended, go in private. Give a positive attribute and action of that pastor, then give the offense. Work to repair the relationship with your pastor. (This is not abuse. In that case, go to the authorities.)

4.     Empower and Encourage your pastors. The Bible states that we are to encourage one another. When you see your pastors, encourage them, even if the message was boring. Find something that they do well and build them up. No one wants to be around people who are always tearing them down. What would happen to the church as a whole if people started building up the leaders? I bet people would start encouraging other people in the church. I bet the church would be the one community people could go to for encouragement.

5.     Pray for your leaders. Prayer works. Pray for your leaders daily. Pray that they make the right decisions, which may not be the decisions that you like, but Christianity is not about our preferences. Pray that they are not tempted. Pray for their health, both mental and physical.

6.     Be kind to the families. I have heard horror stories of pastor’s wives having nervous breakdowns because of the stress of the church. I have known pastor’s kids to walk away from the church and God because of how the people in the church treated their family. Treat the pastor’s family like anyone else in the church. The children may or may not be well-behaved. There is a reason. You take all the time away from their parents. You stress out their parents. Show love and acceptance to the pastor’s families. Do a kind deed for them.

7.     Be aware. The ministry can be lonely. It has stress. They don’t teach us in our Christian colleges how to deal with all of the stress. There is beauty in ministry. There are rewards that are unbelievable. I have more good memories than bad. It takes the church coming together as a family and repairing the relationships within the family.

May we all do better. May we all be better human beings. I hope I begin to hear that pastors are healing our communities and bring people together. I hope that I hear that so many people are giving their lives to Christ that our churches have to meet in tents because they are so full and have so many services. I know. I’m an idealist, but having been on the other side, I know where the hurts are. I know where the strengths are. I know that I will continue to take the time to encourage and empower the staff members at my church, even if they don’t understand it.

9/11 Heroes

Eighteen years ago, our country was attacked on our own land and we changed forever. I watched so much news on television. I couldn’t turn away. I was looking for hope. I was looking for heroes. They were there. It’s their stories we need to know and emulate. It’s time we learn from the heroes and do even small acts that will create a better day for someone.

In 2013, I had the privilege to go to New York City and visit the memorial on our 8^th grade trip with the school where I was teaching. Before we went to the memorial, we ate at a little deli that had the best sandwiches I’ve ever had. The walls are lined with photographs of people who are now friends with the owners. On that day, just a few blocks from the towers, the owners brought people inside and gave them food. They let them stay as long as they needed.

I remember the firefighters running inside the building and the photos and cameras that captured them going up the stairs in the towers, as the people walked down the stairs. Those firefighters saved lives. They gave their lives to allow others to live, as they never exited the building.

The people on United flight 93 who took matters into their own hands and tried to stop the terrorists. They crashed the food cart into the cockpit door. The plane crashed into the ground in Pennsylvania and never made its target into the building that the terrorists were going to hit. Those people stepped on and were “Ready to Roll.”

What about us today? Are we ready to roll? Do we go up the stairs when everyone else is running down? Or do we sit on social media and rant and rave and belittle everyone who does not know what we know or think like we think or believe how we believe. We need heroes. Heroes do not always talk. They act. We need people who are willing to step up and fight the villains. So many people are hurting in our world. Knowledge will not help them. Arrogance will not help them. Belittling or guilt-shaming will not help them. Only love will help.

Heroes are heroes because they know how to love. Love covers a multitude of sins. I need a multitude of sins covered. Love does not keep a record of wrongs. It is not rude. It does not boast. It is patient and kind. Jesus told us to love our enemies. It’s easy to love those who love us. We need to reach out to those who are difficult to love or even strangers that we do not know. We need to love people. We need to love. We need love. We need Jesus.