Time to Think

Have we stopped to think? Is thinking an archaic idea? (Yes, I see the irony in that rhetorical question.) Do we have any new ideas? Are we wasting this precious time in quarantine, especially those of us still in it in states like California waste away because we are not thinking through what we say or write? Have we thought of the dire consequences our constant bickering, and degrading on social media might have on our current and future generation? When and why did we stop thinking? 

It’s these types of questions that can lead a person to discover something great or lead a person to insanity. It’s a difficult discourse because when we share with others that we are concerned and that we need to think, they placate us. As a teacher of teenagers and a youth pastor for sixteen years before that, I have discovered the true irony of asking a teenager what were they thinking when they did something that was truly idiotic. The real question is always, “Why did you not stop to think?” I don’t think I can ask that question to a teenager anymore if the adults in our current culture refuse to think. 

We post comments, memes, and articles on social media that reveals we didn’t stop to think that it could insult someone that is hurting. We post and we don’t think that what we post can be refuted quickly. If someone does refute it, we badger them and belittle them so we can show our superiority, in which, everyone loses, and the original poster does not even realize that they just lost a friend. This all occurs because we didn’t stop to think in the first place. 

Thinking critically means we think of the repercussions of what we say or write or post on social media. Thinking critically means we realize that no human being or group of human beings are perfect or have the answers to all of our problems. People who are able to think and process the problem in front of them and search for a solution. When we search for solutions, we realize that we have to work with those who think, believe, and even vote differently than us. That is the true foundation of critical thinking. 

We stopped thinking and we have become polarized as a society. We stopped thinking and racism runs rampant in our country both with people and institutions being outwardly racist and people and institutions being subtly racist. We stopped thinking and people are killing people or attempting to kill people. We stopped thinking and people are having affairs in their relationships and people getting hurt. We stopped thinking and the church has received a bad reputation, which is the only result we in the church should have seen coming.

We all need to take the time to think. It’s difficult because once we begin thinking, we realize where we are wrong. We just have to admit it.  We can change and become better human beings. We can be kind to one another, but it will only happen when we decide to control our thoughts and think for ourselves. We have this precious commodity of time. We need to use it wisely and think through our words, written and verbal, and create the country that we all long to have. If our leaders refuse to think, we as citizens need to start thinking and stop following thoughtless people. 

I know I have to grow in this area myself, and it is what I am striving to do every single day. Trust me. If you need encouragement of why we need to stop and think, teach one day online to students who don’t want to go to school online. Thinking is required. Thinking should be required of us all. 

We are afraid to stop and think because we recognize the truth. The Truth will set us free. The truth will guide us to think and we can become free of the lies that society tries to tell us through their posts on social media and their words to us in real life. We have to overcome our fears and step out on faith and begin to think. No one can control our thoughts. How or what we think is what we all alone can possess. May we reveal that our thoughts are ones that will build others up and not tear them down. 

We Have Been Duped

 

Two weeks ago, I watched the documentary, The Social Dilemma on Netflix. In that documentary, it is confirmed that we have been duped by those who crated social media sites and it has divided us as a country. I said this over five years ago before the last election. I wish I had created that documentary. People share articles, whether they are true or not, and then they create commentary. This is where they control us. They send us ads and make sure we see more posts about those issues. 

We don’t need to worry about Russia when we are harming each other. We yell and scream at those who think and believe and heaven forbid, vote differently than us. We have decided that our enemies are people that are hiding behind screens. The battle is bloody when we speak evil of one another for believing and thinking differently from us. The strange thing is the beauty of friendships and relationships is the differences in beliefs and thoughts. 

For my entire life, I have always prided myself to have my own beliefs and ideas and not let others easily persuade me. In kindergarten, all the kids told the teacher their favorite color was blue or red. Guess whose favorite color was purple. Yep, even with choosing my favorite color, I was an independent thinker. In this year of 2020, I’m beginning to wonder if compliance would be much easier. With easy comes heartache because doing what is easy is not always doing what is right. We have to do what is right, so compliance is wrong. 

The best thing we can begin to do in this time of our lives is to respect one another. We do not have to agree with one another, but we need to stop demonizing those who think differently than us. We need to understand that because of people’s experiences, they will have different beliefs and thoughts. We must realize that God has created us all with unique qualities and traits. If we all think and believe the same, we become robotic and we are easily led to do whatever any leader tells us to do, which is where social media comes into play. 

With people living online and the social media giants controlling what we do and what shows up in our feeds, we have become easily led to believe that those who think differently from us are pure evil. It is all a sham. They have duped us and it has divided us. We don’t even recognize it. We see it as normal. We see those who believe and think and vote differently from us as the enemies. They are not. Those who are trying to control us, who are in charge of the social media sites and they are succeeding at controlling us, are the enemies. 

It’s difficult to win a war when we are fighting the wrong battles and the wrong enemies. If we continue to fight against each other with how social media is controlling us, we will destroy ourselves and one another. We need to come together and not allow others to control our thoughts and beliefs. It starts with taking time to realize how much we are influenced and who or what influences us. 

Throughout my adult life, I have allowed others to control me because I thought the conflicts would end. In reality, the conflicts grew and most of the conflicts that grew were within my own soul. A few years ago, I realized that I had to become who God created me to be and be the unique person He created me to be, and not throw away what I believe. I can get along with others who think and believe differently than me because to be honest, not many people will claim purple as their favorite color. 

We can disagree. We can have discussions, but once we begin to degrade one another, we have lost. We lose our dignity, our friends, our honor, and our integrity. We need to believe in one another again. We need to take control again. May we understand that what occurs in cyberspace can become real in physical space. People are struggling during this time of confinement. Let’s encourage and build one another up. Let’s think before we post because we don’t really know the struggle someone has on the other side of the computer. May we begin to think of others more than ourselves. May we not allow the social media gurus to destroy us. It’s time we take the control back.  

We Have a Choice to Make

It’s that time of year again. Some of us will choose to indulge in the life of pumpkin spice. Others will choose to indulge in the life of apple spice. Then there are others who will choose to stay with what they always consume. The point is, we always have a choice. It is my hope and prayer that we will begin to choose love over hate. 

If we choose for someone to control us and take over our lives, then that is our choice, and our lives are miserable. If we choose to hate instead of love, then we have chosen a miserable lifestyle. If we choose to trust fate instead of having faith, then we will become miserable with what our future has become. We are not robots, even if the powers in Silicon Valley think we are. We have choices, and we all need to choose to be better and to choose to do the good. 

We all have made the excuse that we just had to strike someone with our words, actions, or fists because they were so out of place with their words, actions, or fists. The truth is we have a choice on how to respond to those that harm us. We have a choice on how to respond to posts on social media that trigger us. We all have a choice on how we live our lives. We all need to begin to make better choices. 

We all have heard our parents or other adult leaders say, “Make good choices!” Many times when that phrase is used, most young people take it as that they need to choose to not get into trouble, but let’s take that phrase a bit further. Maybe we can start using that phrase to stop trouble from spreading or from even entering into our lives. 

It took me years to realize that I had to stop blaming others for my life journey. I made the choices I made. If I was unwise and believed their words, then it was on me. I had a choice to make. I have a choice of how to respond when someone harms me. I can sit and wallow my entire life, or I can get counseling and begin a new life with new insight and have understanding for others who may have my same hurts. I have always had a choice. Once I started making those actual good choices, I became a person with peace, joy, and even happiness. 

We all need to think before we respond, either in person or on social media. We always have a choice, even when something triggers us. We need to remember that everyone has his or her own problems. They see life the way they do because of the circumstances that they have been given. We can get to know them better. We can ask them questions. Once we attack, we made our choice to disrespect and show hate instead of love. 

We need to love those who think and believe differently than us. It’s easy to sit back and judged someone’s thoughts and beliefs and have the idea that ours is the pefect way to life. People who think and believe differently than us have done amazing things for the community, or the country, or the world. We have to stop seeing everyone who believes and thinks differently as the enemy. When we only see them as the enemy, we have chosen hate instead of love.  We have a choice. We need to choose love. 

Jesus had a choice. He could have called on legions of angels to strike down those who were nailing him to the cross. He chose to sacrifice his life so we could live. He chose love instead of hate. We need to follow the one who is perfect. We have a choice. We can choose to follow Jesus or we can choose to follow Christians and religious leaders. We have always had a choice. The choice of life and love is to choose to follow Jesus. The choice of death and hate is to follow Christians and religious leaders because in their human state, they will not choose to die for our sins. 

We have a choice. We have always had a choice. This year, 2020, has been a difficult year for many people for many reasons. We have a choice. We can heal with love or we can hurt with hate. May we all choose love and begin to heal others and ourselves. We always have a choice, so let’s go make good choices! 

 

Cobra Kai--Heroes and Villains

 As I have indulged into the television series, Cobra Kai once again, I have noticed that the simplicity and complexity of the characters truly imitates real life, thus, reigniting  the lesson that art does imitate life.

 

A short summary of Cobra Kai is that the show is the extension of the movie, Karate Kid. It takes the main character and his antagonist into life today. The show makes the antagonist, the bully, Johnny Lawrence the misunderstood hero and the victim of the original Karate Kid, Daniel La Russo, who is now the villain. They both start karate dojos in the valley, and they start the rivalry between the two once again. Actually, Daniel started his dojo to respond to the start of Johnny’s dojo, Cobra Kai, and to restore life in the valley, which many people who cannot see their own flaws do. They do something to respond to their version of their villain.

 

Daniel La Russo is now a rich successful family man, and Johnny Lawrence is a drunken bum trying to get by financially and has an estranged son. They both think they are the victim of each other.  They both believe that they are doing life the right way. Daniel even brags about balance, which will bring peace, and his life is the most chaotic mess, but you have to look closely to see that. Johnny believes that you need to be tough and fight for what you want, while he just gets drunk whenever an obstacle comes his way. Neither one of them can see their own flaws, but they can see the flaws in the other person that victimizes them.  

 

Isn’t that how we all are? We are blind to the plank in our own eyes, and yet, we can see the speck of sawdust in the eyes of those who believe and think differently than us. In fact, we call those specks our enemies and we live our lives trying to take them down instead of working diligently to take the planks out of our own eyes in order to create what we are to do in the world to make a difference.

 

No one is perfect. No one has the perfect life, no matter how it appears on the outside. We cannot see others as the villains and ourselves as the hero who does not have any flaws. In fact, most times, just like the show, Cobra Kai, many of exhibit the same flaws as those we claim to be our villains.

 

We cannot blame the villains for the choices we have made in our lives. It is our choice how we respond to discouragements and trials in life, even if a villain caused them. Then, when we do this, the plank comes out of our eyes and we can see clearly. Once we see clearly, we see the person we have seen as a villainas a human being, and that changes everything.

 

Both the hero and the villain have flaws in their character and good qualities in their character. When we take our planks out, we can have compassion for our villains, as we see that they are struggling with their flaws, even when they cannot see their own flaws. As we see the human beings, we realize that compassion is more of an answer than degrading or revenge.

 

In real life, heroes and villains exist in all of us. We all just have to see our own planks in our own eyes, and remove them in order to be our own hero and not our own villain. The villain does not change. The hero always changes. In order to be a true hero, we have to move forward and do what we are created to do. If we allow the speck of the villain to begin to hold us back from doing that, then it is our own fault. The only way to remove those planks in our own eyes is to just remember and act on the simple phrase, “Strike first, strike hard, no mercy.”

The Value of Trust

 Recently, the movie, Meet the Parents has been on many of the movie channels. As much as we laugh at the antics of Ben Stiller’s character, we also giggle at Robert De Niro’s character and his “Circle of Trust.” As I was watching that movie, I realized that so many of us lack trust because people have broken trust with us. We have believed false information and false narratives. I used to believe that I didn’t trust anyone, but I was wrong. I trusted everyone that surrounded me, and that’s what got me in trouble, and it gets many of us in trouble. It’s what created a lack of trust.

 

When I was young, my parents divorced and somehow, many people believed that they needed to guide me with advice. I don’t blame them for their bad advice. I blame me for taking their bad advice. I took it because I trusted them. Some people revealed why I should not have trusted them in a short time. Others revealed why I shouldn’t have trusted them once a relationship was built with depth, and it’s that when I realized that broken trust is difficult to repair. It’s that broken trust that many of us struggle to trust today in our time of quarantine.

 

There have been so many messages from so many different people and no one will admit when they are wrong. That is what breaks trust. I can trust someone who admits when they are wrong. I cannot trust someone who changes their words and or their rhetoric and never admits that they were wrong in the past or why they have changed from the past. If people do not admit that they are wrong, then they do not admit to their own flaws and wrongdoings, which breaks trust. Trust is built when we can admit to our flaws and wrongdoings and change from doing them. People who cannot admit to being wrong or why they have changed have a history that shows that they are unfaithful. Their lies reveal that they are untrustworthy.

 

When we change from our old ways, we don’t have to tell others our wrongs, but we can realize that the old way is gone and the new has come, which builds a new trust. It’s why I can trust God. Jesus did not throw out the old law; he completed it. I can trust God because I have seen what he has done in my life and in the lives of other people. Many people lose trust in God because of how people have behaved. God is not a person. Science is not a person. It’s not the message people do not trust; it’s the messenger. In order for people to see God, we must be trustworthy.

 

Being trustworthy as a person means we must act. Our actions speak louder than words. If we disagree with someone, we must be kind. If you want to be trustworthy and begin name calling and degrading someone, you are not going to gain any trust, and your information will be disregarded. You are just pushing your agenda. I know because I’ve had that occur many times in my life.  

 

Our world needs trustworthy people. We don’t have to trust all the information that is being fed to us by any media source, but we do need to begin to trust each other. We need to believe that people want the best for each and every person. In order to trust other people, we need to be trusted. Our trust may have been broken, but we can build it back when we apologize and admit that our actions were wrong.

 

Tomorrow I will meet my new students. I will have to gain their trust. I cannot call them names or degrade them. in fact, it is through encouragement that trust will be built. It is through love that trust will be built. When we love God, others and ourselves, then we will be able to build trust with and for others. My final words are from a passage that many Christians have memorized and many of us need to practice. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)

Adventures in a Quarantined Summer

 Every summer since 2015, I have been able to travel and visit friends from college, Bible Bowl, and high school. This year, life has been quarantined, and I have had different adventures. During the first four months of quarantine, I was looking for a new job. My school was downsizing, and since I taught elective English classes last year, (and I’m expensive because of credentials and years taught) I was laid-off. I’ve already been through one school closing, and I don’t want to be in another one, so I was actually relieved to go somewhere new. (There was and is no ill will.) It took time because I really didn’t want to teach at a charter school, but this is difficult times and charter schools are hiring. Each time I pray for what I want, God gives me what I need, and this time was no exception.

 

I applied to schools to teach online, which pay significantly less than in-person teaching, districts that are not hiring but interviewed me anyway and private schools. I applied to one and only one in-person charter school. I got the job. God doesn’t work in just mysterious ways; he works in humorous ways. God does what is best, which will always provide for our needs. Although we will be teaching online for at least the first semester, I wanted to see the campus and get a vibe for the community where the students live. So, yesterday, I went on an adventure.

 

This charter school is in an entire system of charter schools. They do have two schools near downtown Los Angeles, but not the one where I was hired, which I found out yesterday. I knew the name of the street and ditched Google maps and decided to go my way until the street numbers were wacky and I was going out of downtown Los Angeles. I found my school on the border of Pasadena, Eagle Rock, and Highland Park. For my friends outside of Los Angeles, it’s on the other side of downtown Los Angeles, and not close to the downtown at all. It’s close to the mountains. It’s pretty.

 

I love exploring new places. Of course, I went off the trail a bit afterward and found a cute little bookstore at the bottom of the mountain where our church camp is located. I may not have traveled very far, but the adventure is not in the place but in the people that I will encounter. People make life so much better, and that is where many of us are struggling in this pandemic. The adventure always requires me to trust God and what is best for me in my life and not always what I want.

 

God has given me the best jobs throughout my lifetime. I have met some of my closest friends and have inspired many young people to live their lives for Jesus and make a difference in the world. Change can be scary and not always easy, but it is necessary as it creates growth and brings new adventures that requires us to trust God just a bit more in life. New adventures also create reflection of where we have been and where we are going.

 

The direction for life in this quarantine for me is taking a turn as I have to teach and do most of my communication with others online. While most of us have to sit behind our computers to communicate, we may need to resolve to be kind. I know I have had my share of times of not being kind. People are struggling with loss of jobs, loss of life with family members and friends, and loss of relationships. We can argue about politics all day long and not one thing will change in our country or in our world. We can encourage people and we can make a huge difference in the world without even leaving our home. I have been surprised for someone to tell me the words that I have said, both good and bad that have changed them. Our words make a difference in the lives of others.

 

The impact we make on the world can make a difference. You don’t have to be a teacher to hundreds of students. You can be someone who encourages family members that are struggling. If we want a change in the world, we have to do it. We need to stop relying on someone else to do what we can do, especially anyone in government. It’s taken me many years to discover this. Let us all take an adventure and explore new ideas of how to encourage more and argue less. With our new adventures, let us discover ways to make a difference, whether it is through the arts or technology. If we are so busy working to make a difference in the world, we will have less time to argue or to post the same stuff on social media that angers people. It’s healthier way to live. It’s life giving. It’s the way that God wants us to live.  

 

The Masked Bandit

I refuse to get into the mask debate during this pandemic. The masks that I notice are invisible to the eye, but if we look closer, we can see them. We all wear one at some point. Most of us deny that we do, but trust me, I have worn the masks so many times that when I take one off I can barely recognize myself. We hide behind our masks. We wear masks that profess to the world of who we are, and yet, underneath our masks, we are not that person.

The mask of shame. Throughout my life, leaders have guilt-shamed me so much that I have to remember my true identity in Christ and take that mask off and discard it. These leaders are Christians in the church and non-Christians in places where I have worked or volunteered. Guilt-shaming had me serve in areas that I had no business serving and my attitude was one of anger and resentment. I never represent Christ when I wear my mask of shame. People try to guilt shame on social media. I can tell you you’re right, but on my side of the computer, I’m not going to wear a mask of shame. I’m going to be transparent or wear a mask of lies.

The mask of lies. We must be honest and realize that at some point in our lives we have all worn a mask of lies. If we say we haven’t, we’re lying. We even justify our lies. We say we lie not to hurt someone, but once they realize the truth, they are more hurt. Lies trap us. The truth frees us. We need to be honest with ourselves and others. If we can be honest with ourselves first, then we can be honest with others. When we lay down the mask of lies, we then realize who our allies and adversaries are.

The mask of hypocrisy. Like the mask of lies, most people have at one point in their lives worn a mask of hypocrisy. It clouds our vision of who are allies and adversaries are. We say we believe one thing, but we do the exact opposite. The most difficult part of this mask is that we actually believe our hypocrisy. Most of us do not even see our own hypocrisy as we throw down memes on social media that prove an argument. We need to be careful, as this mask can be layered. Once we take off the mask, we usually have one behind it hiding because we are fearful to reveal the truth of our authentic selves.

All of these masks cover us and protect us from the truth. These masks protect us from people criticizing us, until they recognize the truth and then we are discredited. We need to strip these masks away and keep them off. These masks cover-up Christ in our lives. We don’t always recognize it, but people can see our masks, even if we wear them on social media. We need to throw these masks off and breathe in the breath of God and allow the Holy Spirit to work in us, so we can bring the Holy Spirit to our world that so needs healing in many ways right now. Once we are transparent and true to ourselves, the world around us will see the grace of God and begin to wonder how to have His grace in their own lives.